One day after work, I met up with a friend, his girlfriend and a few co-workers at a lounge. His girlfriend started to "educate" the men on the thought processes of women.
She started out by saying, "You men do not understand us women. You guys need to know that when a woman says 'No' it can mean, 'No' but it can also mean, 'Try harder'."
The men were a bit perplexed at this statement and started to ask her questions. They were eager to find out more but they, knowing who I was, kept an eye on me because they knew I would chime in on this subject.
I kept quiet until the questions died down. After all the questions were asked, I reached in my pocket and pulled out 5 - $100 bills and handed to her.
Not knowing what to say she looked at the others, looking for cues on how to react. She then asked, "What is that for?"
"Its for you. Take it.", I said.
She, sheepishly reached out and started to take the money. When she was about to touch it, I pulled back and said, "Why did you not tell me 'No', even if you meant 'No' or 'Try harder'?"
She almost stuttered when she said, "Well, there is no need for me to tell you 'No' or 'Try harder' that money has value."
"Exactly right", I said.
I told her that if I asked a girl on a date and if she said "No" and meant "No" then I will respect her wishes. I also told her that if I asked a girl on a date and she said "No" that was meant for me to try harder, then she has no respect for me and sees no value in my offer. I asked the group if they would ever order someone offering a gift to them to "Try harder. The group shook their heads in unison.
This is a key factor in understanding female dysfunctional pseudo-logic.
Another example of this disfunction is when I was in Miami and we were out in a nightclub with the boys. There was a younger guy in our troop that was an amazing dancer. He asked one girl to dance and he was turned down. With his tail between his legs he came over to me and told me that he wanted to dance but he got turned down. I looked towards the bar and saw 6 girls in a row nursing their drinks watching the dance floor. I told him to ask those girls to dance.
Puzzled, he asked, "What if they turn me down?"
I looked at him and said, "If one turns you down, ask the other."
I told him to keep asking until one says "Yes".
He then walked over to the first girl and asked her to dance. When she said, "No" he went to the next. By the third girl, he had a partner. The third girl got the hint that this guy would not ask a second time and she would miss an opportunity if she did not accept. They danced fantastic together. In fact, all the other girls that turned him down were upset and even jealous that he was getting compliments on the dance floor.
The most interesting part of this story is that, after a while, the first of the 6 girls that he asked came up to me and said, "Your friend is stupid"
I answered her with a short, "I know", because that would make it harder for her to say anything else. She wanted a lead-in like, "Why?" To make it easier to reply.
Frustrated, (Ha ha) she blurted out, "He only asked me once. I would have danced with him if he asked again."
I finished the conversation with, "I'll let him know he is stupid when he gets back."
This girl said, "No" but wanted him to try harder. She put the barrier in front of him to see how much this man desired her when he breaks that barrier. She wanted to be desired so much that he would break the block she put in his way.
Do you get it? Good!
I showed some examples how women place roadblocks (to herself) in front of a man to see if the man desires her so much that he would break the block she put in his way. She will use the word "No" to block you when she really means, "Try harder". This is not to say that all "No's" mean to "Try harder", some "No's" do actually mean "No" at her discretion which makes this situation pretty precarious to say the least.
Once you have identified this problem, you have a decision to make. You can nip it in the bud before blossoms. No matter what you do it will be there, but managing someone's innate subconscious impulses can be trying on ones patience. Either that or you can leave. No matter what you decide to do, identifying the problem is key and not knowing the problem can be costly.
As a teen you may have had a girl abruptly stop a make out session or interrupt the flow of a sexual encounter with the dreaded words, "Where is this relationship going?" No matter how you answer it at the time, she will become more and more frustrated because the roadblock she put between you prevented you from going after her. She asks what she doesn't want and gets mad when you comply.
In another story I wrote, (tinyurl.com/jma3egn) a girlfriend of mine was on the phone from the minute I arrived at her place, through dinner until after I went to bed. When I was asleep, thats when she attacked. From her perception, she was mad that her deliberate block from me to her (never ending phone conversations) was successful in stopping me to get to her.
When you ask a girl for her number or her name, (don't do that that is the wrong approach) her immediate response will almost always be, "Why?" In this case, questioning your request is the block. She is putting a rule in front of you that she wants you to break. This is how she unconsciously responds to block your approach.
A better approach to get her phone number is to offer her your smartphone, already in dial mode and tell her to dial her number. She may perceive asking as begging and a direct order as evidence of confidence. She may still say "No" or ask "Why" but if you insist without showing any anger or frustration, she may give in. Bear in mind that she may say "No" and mean it. Make sure when you do this, you have a good phone case, she may even drop your phone.
I know many of you have heard the phrase, "I want a man that knows what he wants." To you or me that statement sounds stupid. Any 6 year old knows what they want. They want a pony and live in a castle. What women should say is, "I want a man that knows what he wants from me no matter how much I try to stop him." To her, a man who knows what he wants despite the roadblocks she puts up in front of him and taking her, is "putting her in her place." Which is another phrase a girl might say. Can you see where this is going?
In all these cases a woman is using a lie or a manipulation, to get you to do what she expects of you, to correct her to for your purposes to her liking. She uses a lie to get you to show how much you desire her, whenever she sees fit that will meet her approval. This video (goo.gl/ERF5c2) is a girl explaining it as best a girl can.
So if you are about to go out on with a girl and she gives you a hard time at the last minute, thats a block. The thing you can do is keep in focus and be firm about going out while ignoring her complaints, without being angry or frustrated. You can not cater and nurture this behavior or it will get worse. Do not give in to her lies and manipulation.
There is a whole lot more of this in Part 3 that will explain;
why women leave men why the like criminals why they take kids away from men and say that the father didn't love their own child
