Make Me Like You

I was working on securing a contract with a new company that had shown interest in my services. After some initial back-and-forth, they suddenly stopped responding.

Weeks later, their secretary texted me, and we arranged to meet at a local TGI Fridays near their office. We sat down, ordered drinks, and she hinted that she could be influential in getting my contract approved, but she wanted a monetary incentive. I agreed. She then asked if she could order a cheap appetizer. I said yes. When it arrived, she smiled and said how easy she was to please, calling the dish a true delight.

I paid the bill, and she promised to contact me soon.

A week later, she sent me a link to a restaurant’s website. This place was on a sprawling estate with horse-drawn carriages, a marble staircase to the dining area, a grand piano, wandering violinists, and an over-the-top five-course menu with absurdly expensive wines.

I asked why she sent it. She said it was her favorite restaurant. I commented, “You must go there often to like it so much.” She replied, “You’re not catching my hint. Do I need to spell it out for you? I want you to take me here if you want my boss to accept your bid. You need to make me like you for this to happen.”

That’s when it became clear she had no real influence at all. She just wanted someone to drop piles of money on her. I texted back, “I don’t know how to make anyone like me. If I could, I’d make a hot model like me, not someone like you.”

She never contacted me again, and I never wondered why.